Watchdog
by Drea Jackman
Summary: Joshua contemplates what’s meant to be and proves once and for all that he’s not just another dumb dog. (POV using imagery taken from as far as The Berrisford Agenda with no specific ‘ship of M/L or M/A).


TITLE: Watchdog  
  
WRITTEN BY: Drea Jackman  
  
EMAIL: X5-117@GeneticallyEngineered.co.uk  
  
WEBSITE: Of Dreams & Reality - http://DreaJackman.cjb.net/  
  
RATING: G  
  
SUMMARY: Joshua contemplates what's meant to be and proves once and for all that he's not just another dumb dog. (POV using imagery taken from as far as The Berrisford Agenda with no specific `ship of M/L or M/A).  
  
DISCLAIMER: All Dark Angel characters belong to James Cameron and Charles Eglee (Cameron Eglee Productions) and Dark Angel itself belongs to FOX...it's just not fair is it? *Sob*  
  
ARCHIVE: If I've said yes before I'll say it again, otherwise email me 'n' lemme know.  
  
FEEDBACK: Don't make me beg, please? ...D'OH!  
  
SPOILERS: Nothing but what I've taken from Joshua's later comments about Alec in The Berrisford Agenda using the idea's from Joshua Number 57, Alec's painting. His idea was spot on, I just wanted to develop it a little and use it here :P  
  
A/N: No rotten tomatoes please! Lol, I know I've not finished off Thicker Than Water or State of Mind, but I've written 4 pages to TTWch5 and I've hit a brick wall. I can't seem to even pick up where I want to in SoM so alas, here's a stand-alone from good ol' Josh's POV. I know for sure he's got more goin' on than most give him credit for (look at Berrisford and I like to think he's watching the `ships were pushing in much the same way. First time I've ever tried writing for Joshua too so please have mercy and be kind?  
  
Watchdog  
  
"Joshua, man with canine DNA not meant to be."  
  
Pacing the floor before the fireplace of Father's house Joshua thought aloud as he passed the hours of yet another Seattle brownout. Strangely enough he found them comforting at times. The basement at Manticore may have been a prison of sorts, but for the majority of his life it had also been home and a small part of that knowledge brought comfort. During blackouts, Sandeman's home was a more comforting version of the only home the transgenic had known for so long.  
  
"World outside with out-there people damaged, broken," he continued as the flames flickered and cast his tall shadow across the open floor and onto the far wall. Joshua's head tilted to the side as he looked at it with the same child-like wonder he did so many things in his new world, broken or otherwise.  
  
"Lay low, freaks," he said quietly as he turned away from his shadow to crouch into a posture more fitting of his canine side. Sitting by the fire he tended it thoughtfully as the flames crackled in the hearth. "Joshua not meant to be, X5's too. Max and Alec not meant to be."  
  
Joshua's eyes watched the flames dance and play in the now roaring hearth and let his hand reach out towards them briefly. Feeling the warmth he recoiled slightly as if remembering that pretty or outward appearances could be deceiving. Still, he enjoyed the warmth and beauty the fire held. He found himself taking comfort in voicing his thoughts even if only for the benefit of his shadow and it's ears alone.  
  
"Lots of things not meant to be," he carried on, voice soft and distant, strangely unfitting of first physical appearance the owner betrayed.  
  
"Max and Logan meant to be, but can't be. Manticore virus not meant to be, but is."  
  
The contradiction in terms wasn't lost on Joshua, despite how limited his full knowledge of the exact situation with the virus was.  
  
"People afraid of what's different."  
  
It was very true. The outside world was afraid of change; of people or things who were different from them in the majority. Since he and all the other transgenics had been let out into the world, even the less `nomalie-like' in appearance had, had to take more care. White was on their tail and people were at least somewhat aware of their existence.  
  
A few minutes passed and Joshua sighed a contented, but very dog-like sigh and lowered his eyes. Tracing the flow of his shadow out across the floor he turned to watch it stretch out across the room, not quite reaching the far wall in his now seated position. Seeing the central darkness surrounded by all the pretty, flickering colours emanating from the fire behind him, he realised something again and thought aloud.  
  
"Max not afraid of what's different, but scared of same," he finished slowly, again his head leaning slightly as the idea and realisation cleared in his mind's eye.  
  
"Not see what's in front of her. Love Logan she does, but Joshua can see the other."  
  
On some level even Joshua was certain Max must have known how Alec felt or if not his true feelings, at least why she felt the way she did about him. Alec was made perfect just like her, but that didn't mean he couldn't make mistakes. Manticore may have played God in the creation of such creatures, but Joshua liked the idea that humanity was at the centre. He'd watched her look down on Alec since meeting and slowly it had all become apparent to him. It was a harshness he felt came from her own hidden fears.  
  
Alec was much like the image he stared at so intently before him. Dark inside, surrounded by pretty colours. `Tricks and treats,' he called them, for just like at Halloween, Alec's true self was hidden behind the mask of charm and indifference. Others may have had the ability to overlook it, but Joshua could see it all.  
  
Max indeed appeared to fear the similarity between her and Alec. Both X5, both bred and built for the same purpose, both not meant to be and yet Joshua could sense the meaning behind them constantly being thrown together. If Max and Logan were really meant to be, then why did the virus manage to get between them the way it had? Why had Alec been assigned and paired up with Max and why now did the pair seem to spend so much time together? The idea of what fate had planned was confusing.  
  
All questions Joshua had to smile at a little for who out of his newfound friends would have believed he was even thinking them let alone seeing the truth for himself where they could not? Dumb dog he wasn't, not in the slightest, instead quiet and ever aware.  
  
Standing up Joshua walked over to the window and looked out onto the darkened street. His part of the neighbourhood wasn't the worst the city had to offer, but it was still somewhere most non-transgenics thought twice about treading alone at night. Again, something that puzzled him. Out-there people feared their own sometimes more than they did his kind.  
  
The world outside, broken as it was, still puzzled him. Partially he feared it for he'd never been exposed to anything like it before. Still, his fear was banished by the knowledge that the need for companionship brought on by his canine side, would be satisfied in his friendship with Max and even Alec. No matter how Max saw Alec, Joshua could see the man beneath the façade so many were faced with. He supposed maybe it was because he knew better than anyone else, that outward appearances could hide the man within so well.  
  
Max was afraid Alec would use him; play him for the dim wit he suspected they sometimes saw him as. Joshua knew the truth of the matter regardless. `Alec only outsmarts Alec,' he thought.  
  
Okay, he supposed even Alec succeeded in fooling Max too, but her own fear and reluctance to look at him for what he was made the task much easier. Alec, he thought in that instant, only fooled himself into believing he could outsmart everyone around him, never letting them see the real him and never making them question the image he set up for them. Joshua had to wonder why his own inexperience in the world could leave him equipt to see straight through Alec's mask.  
  
Max's too. She was exactly the same; all dark and hidden on the inside while presenting a completely different face to the world full of pretty colours and smiles. While time on the outside had been hers to adjust, the game was still the same as Alec's. Both fooled those closest to them in varying degrees, including themselves and each other even though they always clashed in the process.  
  
So many different faces surrounding him and yet Joshua saw it all. Quietly watching and listening, taking in every aspect and adding it up. Max had referred to Logan as Eyes Only, but a small part of him wondered if that was really true in a literal sense. Of everything he could see, Logan was the one to see the least. He cared for Max, Joshua knew that, but he knew very little of Alec or himself. Both were a party to important aspects of her life now. Joshua innocently questioned the lack of attention.  
  
Logan was blind, or so it appeared at least, to all but Max. Max was blind to the real man in Alec, for whatever reason, and the way he looked at her, friend or otherwise Joshua wasn't sure yet, but at least there was the subconscious fear of their apparent similarity. Then there was Alec, blind to the fact that his smarts and wit only served to reveal more of himself to those who knew how to look, instead of helping him to hide behind the mask of a well-adjusted escapee who was always okay.  
  
"So much not meant to be," he whispered quietly to himself as he crossed the room and sat lazily in Father's chair by the fireplace. The warm glow had begun to die down and the house was blissfully warm even in the dimming light. As he felt the haze of sleep taking over, Joshua continued to mutter the results of his evening's contemplation.  
  
"So much they can't..." He paused briefly to sniff gently as his eyes closed. "...Can't see."  
  
Joshua's nose twitched again as his body and motions grew still in the comfort of the chair and warmth of the fire. His last words were bearly audibly as he drifted off.  
  
"Joshua, can see, what...what is and is not meant to be..." 


End file.
